1. It's a maze
The app map may say the next venue is 300m away but it doesn't take into account that the city operates on two levels and once you're on the lower level it snakes all over the place.
2. It's a slow maze
Not only will the hills exhaust you but the amount of people there for the festival means you spend most of the day walking in the road. Woe betide you walk the narrow path through Princes Street Gardens clogged with tatty craft fair stalls and a thousand meanderers.
3. Every space is a stage
Including next to traffic lights. I listened to a man sing Beatles songs interspersed with impressions of John Lennon through an amp the size of a shoebox whilst I waited for the green man. In fairness, he was pretty good.
4. There are more shows than you could ever see in a lifetime
I have enough flyers to wallpaper the flat.
5. People are actually quite generous
Bucket donation on the free fringe may sound like the equivalent of busking with a roof over your head but it turns out that if you're any good people will regularly put notes in your bucket. Even if you're awful they'll still give you change.
6. Some venues resemble the torture rooms in Hostel
Just the Tonic at the Caves, I'm talking to you.
7. Whilst others look like storage rooms for restaurant supplies.
Because they actually are.
8. Drinking is pretty much mandatory
Support the venue!
9. Every performer is, without exception, an absolutely lovely person
Or maybe I was just lucky.
10. Performers are a creative bunch in ways additional to their material
From constructing stages out of packaged up flat pack furniture to sellotaping their posters to their t-shirts, you can see an active mind at work.
Buzzfeed here I come...