Comedy Beast at The Hoop and Toy, South Kensington

This evening I headed down to South Kensington for the newly relocated Comedy Beast with MC Peter Merriment. Having found out Anna and I had made the heats for Musical Comedian of the Year earlier in the day, I was focussed on how to deliver two songs with the requisite before and between song patter in the 8 minute limit.

The room was well lit with plenty of other acts in attendance plus a smattering of real audience. I found myself to be topping the evening's entertainment and settled in with a pint of coke and no preconceptions.

The material flowed with the usual mix of the good and the very much in development. It was a warm crowd though and we urged each other on when things got rocky. The bit about masturbating someone's nose will probably stay with me forever - no matter how much I try to expunge it.

Come 10pm I was up and delivering Meal Deal with caffeine-assisted vigour and the clubbing chat that preceded West End revealed three clubs that had never come up before (Jesters, Valentinos and Manhatten I salute you). I'm building quite a picture of the UK's least desirable night spots. I suspect it could be the basis for a Radio 4 endorsed travel log in a similar vein to that book about traversing the UK open mic scene with a ukelele.

Did I do it in 8 minutes? Did I heck. 10 minutes and 3 seconds. Time for some serious editing on the chat. That or write a song that lasts 1:30.